Nov
28

Moms forum: jealousy of stay-at-home moms

Posted in Mom Stuff
by besttech

McClatchy-Tribune

Moms Forum spotlights useful discussion taking place on the parenting forums of newspapers around the country.

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QUESTION: Anyone have people jealous of them because they are a stay-at-home mom? My husband just told me some of his friend’s wives are jealous because I am fortunate enough to get to stay at home mom with my two kids.

— Posted by shaunalb7 at sacmomsclub.com

RESPONSES:

“When I first started staying home I got comments all the time that, ‘oh good now you will have lots of time to relax, or, “lucky you, I wish I didn’t have to work.” They don’t understand what is involved. My two sons are 20 months apart, and even my husband didn’t get it at first, until I went out of town and he was on his own for three days! He hasn’t made a comment since. It is wonderful raising your own children instead of someone else, but it is hard, I hear you. “

“We all make difference choices on how to lead our lives and raise our families. I have lot of friends who are stay-at-home moms and I applaud them for the work they do, just as they applaud me for trying to balance a full-time job with having a family. We wouldn’t be friends if we didn’t have that mutual admiration and respect.

“If you are encountering people who are jealous or envious, you are obviously meeting the wrong people. Life is too short to complain about things you can’t change or defend the decisions you make. You should feel confident that what you are doing is right for YOUR family, and don’t worry about what other people think.”

“I think I feel the opposite. I wish I could work and have a family member take care of my son. But that is not the case for me. Now my sister is a teacher and works full-time and her husband is a therapist and their son goes to day care two days a week the rest of his time he spends with family . I miss working but I also know my son will be in school in a few years and then I can go back to work. Right now I think he needs me.”

“I was a 100 percent SAHM till my son was in first grade. Then I only worked when he was in school. Over the years there have been a few times where I tried to work full-time and it just never worked out (for me or him). We also just cut back and get along fine. I was a 100 percent daycare kid and HATED IT! I swore when I had children that I would stay home with them. I’m very glad and feel super lucky that I got to do that. Nope, I’ve never had any jealousy. But I have been jealous of my working husband many many many times. I wouldn’t trade though and love being there for my son.”

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(c) 2008, McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.

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