Protecting kids from themselves is a challenge

Posted in Mom Stuff
by Alicia Castelli

Is it possible to curb a child’s natural curiosity, especially when it’s combined with a terrifying lack of impulse control?
We have a seven-foot tall cabinet in our basement and have caught our two youngest, 4-year-old Keira and 6-year-old Ethan, trying to climb it to reach things on the higher shelves inside.
We’ve very clearly explained the danger of this.
My mother was babysitting recently and Ethan decided to climb the cabinet. Sure enough, it fell over on him despite furniture cups under the front corners to further stabilize it.
Thankfully, Ethan wasn’t hurt, but I’m sure he took several years off my mother’s life. He managed to wiggle out from underneath the cabinet before my mom even got to him.
Why must children learn so many lessons the hard way?
It seems perfectly clear to me that if you say, “Don’t climb on that because it could fall over and hurt you” that the child would, well, not climb on it.
I understand children, especially boys, develop impulse control during their late teenage years, but I’m on a quest for a way to hasten that process.
As a reporter, I write way too many stories about tragedies involving children that could’ve been avoided if the kids had managed to curb their curiosity and control their impulses. In the past year, at least three such stories were about children who died as a result of their activities.
Thankfully, the cabinet doors were closed when it tipped over. I’m assuming Ethan’s body was directly in front of it and kept the doors from swinging open and dumping wooden puzzles, games and other toys on his head. He could have been very badly hurt.
Instead of appreciating the severity of the accident, I overheard Ethan and 10-year-old Ryan making “flat as a pancake” jokes about it.
Where’s the line between trying to acquaint children with consequences and creating phobias that will require therapy later in life because you’ve scared the crap out of them in attempt to get them to take safety warnings seriously?
I’d like to hear how other parents are dealing with the whole “Don’t stick the fork in the electrical outlet because…” aspect of parenting. What works for you and what hasn’t worked? How forceful is too forceful a warning? How to teach consequences without creating a child terrified of his own shadow? Which lessons do you let them learn the hard way and what circumstances require adult intervention? Bubble wrap them from head to toe? Actually, I kind of like that one…