By Marla Jo Fisher, The Orange County Register
It’s soccer season now, which means it’s time for the coach or designated party to hold a gun to your head and say,”Give me all your money.”
I just went to my kid’s mandatory parent meeting last night for this year’s soccer team, the Silly Kangaroos, and the team mom read off a list of all the stuff I have to pay for in addition to the fees I already paid for my kid to join the team.
I have to buy two discount cards at $10 each. But I can find some friends (maybe in Australia) who don’t have any kids and aren’t dead broke or laid off and try to make them buy them from me.
I also have to pay $10 for the team banner and another $10 because there isn’t any sponsor willing to kick in and support our team.
So, altogether, I have to shell out another 40 bucks for Cheetah Boy to play on the team, and I’m sure next week I’ll hear the same news for Curly Girls’ team.
Oh, except for the money I’ll have to pay at the end of the season for the coaches’ gifts and the overpriced party at the expensive arcade pizza parlor.
Now, I can’t help having this crazy, crazy idea in the back of my head, but I’m afraid to tell you what it is because you might make fun of me.
Imagine if they just rolled all these extra fees into the cost of the season enrollment, so you knew what the actual cost would be for your kid to kick around a ball with a bunch of other kids for the next two months?
I know, your side is aching from laughing, but I warned you it was a nutty idea.
After I shelled out the 40 bucks, we stopped by the store to get new soccer cleats for Curly Girl, though they didn’t have Cheetah Boy’s size. This means we have to go to a sporting goods store where dads will be buying their sons expensive cleats, and we’ll feel like dirt while I insist that my son take the ugly ones on sale.
Then it will soon be time for me to get up at 6:30 a.m. every Saturday again and use hydraulic force to pry my kids out of their beds, so they have time to wake up and eat breakfast before their games.
On the plus side, Cheetah Boy’s team decided that the boys can bring their own snacks to the games, except for the mandatory legally required sliced oranges at halftime.
Marla Jo Fisher was a workaholic before she adopted two foster kids several years ago. Now she juggles work and single parenting, while being exhorted from everywhere to be thinner, smarter, sexier, healthier, more frugal, a better mom, better dressed and a tidier housekeeper. Contact her at firstname.lastname@example.org. Read her blog at http://themomblog.freedomblogging.com/category/frumpy-middleaged-mom-marla-jo-fisher/.