Tackling the dental dilemma

By Eden Pontz, NYC Moms Blog

There are a lot of things in New York City in which parents generally expect to spend “more than the norm.” Birthday parties, babysitting, shoes, are a few that come immediately to mind. But following a recent visit to the pediatric dentist, as the receptionist handed me the bill, I wondered whether they use gold in the fillings here, instead of silver.

We took my daughter to her first dental appointment at the age of three, as recommended by her pediatrician. The dentist kept my husband waiting for an hour with no explanation or apology, took our kid into the office and counted her teeth. That was it. And then she gave him a bill for $150 dollars. Huh. Evidently, I’m in the wrong business.

Not interested in...

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The most important meal of the day

Because breakfast is the most important meal of the day, I’ve adopted the habit of serving it to my daughter throughout the day. I’m not sure when she switched to being a picky eater, but now she refuses to eat kid staples like hamburgers, hot dogs, chicken nuggets and pizza, never mind the healthy alternatives I present. I’m embarrassed to continue to serve my 19-month-old the jars of baby food she still enjoys. She does tend to try new things, and even if she spits it out in my hand after a several chews, I will continue doing what works. Our go-to staples are relatively healthy so I am not terribly concerned that she will be malnourished and I know that she will not starve herself.

Foods my daughter almost always eat:

Attacks of the heart: Who are these people?

Here are some of the choice things said to me recently by friends and family:

As I was on my way to the gym:

“I so admire you, Nancy. I could never leave the house looking like that.”

As I was entering a dressing room to try on bathing suits:

“Are you gonna fit in those?”

As I was apologizing to another mother whose son my own son teased:

“Well, a lot of the boys have been teasing. But of course that’s your son’s fault.”

As I was saying goodbye to a mother who had come to my apartment to pick up her child from a playdate:

“Is this space adequate for you? With two children? You...

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Advice not wanted

From Rebecca Rodskog:

Do I have to say it again? I do not need your advice. Do you think, in these days of the “information super-highway” (do people still use that term?), that I can’t figure it out on my own? Or, worst case scenario, if I haven’t the brains to figure something out by asking my many sources (web, pediatrician, family, friends, books, magazines), that a comment from a STRANGER on a street corner will influence what I do with my child? I highly doubt it. So just save your breath and stop it. Here are my responses to all of your “friendly” comments.

…

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Because I love your sister more

I read a post from a mother who stated that anyone who denies having a favorite child is lying to herself. She said it was inevitable and even natural. She said that it changes for her depending on what her children are doing. I did some research and it turns out that 1 in 6 mothers has a favorite. This really stuck with me and I have thought about it a lot. I kept thinking, do I, deep down, love one more? Do I hug one more or react to one more favorably? And I have drawn this conclusion: No. Thank goodness, no. In fact, I would go so far as to say that it is irresponsible to write something off as “natural” when it is probably damaging or at least hurting the less favored child/children forever.

I find parenting endlessly complicated and I...

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Secrets to selling your home

We recently put our Manhattan apartment on the market.

Sure, we thought about selling this summer when real estate in New York City was escalating outrageously fast but then we figured, who wants to make that much money so easily?

So now we’re selling it during a major recession.

Everyone knows when you are selling your home, you don’t need a broker. You just need the right signature scent. Some advocate baking cookies or an apple pie before an open house but those must be people who don’t store half their cookware in their oven.

So I went in search of the perfect candle. I was looking for a scent like, “This is the nicest apartment I’ve ever seen, I’ll pay...

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One of the best-kept secrets of motherhood

(MCT)

This might be “too much information,” but I am going to plunge ahead anyway: I got an IUD! Normally, I am not one to overshare (I hope!) but this seems to be one of the best-kept secrets of motherhood. I think this is going to be life-changing for me. Let me share a bit of history with you: Both of my children were pleasant surprises. I consider myself a smart, savvy women, but somehow, despite a minor in women’s studies and reading tons of information on birth control methods during my younger years, two things took me by surprise.

Myth No. 1: Birth control pills take a while to leave your system.

I thought after being on the pill for more than five years that my body would need a...

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Musings from a bad mommy

With my daughter I was the uber-mom — maybe even slightly overbearing. I could anticipate her crying before she even began to whimper — I sat with her for hours and poured over alphabet books reading and quizzing her and stockpiled every Disney princess fairy tale movie available and watched them with her religiously.

Looking back I think my obsession with her was more a result of my own feelings of failure, than the fact that I wanted to be this super-involved and enmeshed with my child type of mom. I suffered with severe post-partum depression for the first year of her life and when I finally came out of my fog I felt as if I’d lost those first 12 months — all her “firsts” were blurred images that I couldn’t truly decipher or...

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The downside of the loftbed

We hear it from the moment our baby boys are born. Older people (and even younger people with older kids — who always end up feeling like older people) seem to love to tell us mothers of little boys that they’ll grow up and leave us someday. My sister-in-law used to say she wanted daughters “because they never really leave their moms.” It all kinda creeps me out, like there’s some set rule out there. It’s odd to think that my unique little baby boy could ever just become one of those grown-up guys these women love to tell me about.

What a love affair it’s been with this little boy! And to top it off he was kind of shy and preferred to be with me, hanging out, with us, in our living room, at home, than anywhere else. He wouldn’t even take a class...

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A mother’s clothing rut

My daughters’ field trip seasons are in high gear. Every week it seems we are trekking to another zoo, aquarium, wetland refuge or theater. In my stay-at-home mom guilt-daze I feel compelled to go on each and every one of them.

Since I have twins this means that I am often piling into a school bus with my bag lunch in hand at least once a week. And my daughters seem to appreciate it. They like the comfort of having me there, know that they can hit up a vending machine since I’m there with spare change, and they get to pick a partner instead of waiting to be chosen themselves.

But last week one of my daughters upped the ante. While I was getting dressed to go on a Lincoln Center field trip she came into my room eyed me...

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